Author: Joey Held

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Ep. 82: Little Ditty About Ron and Diane

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “Little Ditty About Ron and Diane” on Spreaker.

This is one of the finest episodes of Parks and Rec but probably not one of our finest podcast episodes. But we’ll let you be the judge of that, eh? Jerry’s hosting a dinner party and the people that are usually the meanest to him haven’t been invited. Leslie, Ron, and Diane try to avoid the madness that is Tammy 2 at a woodworking awards banquet. Shenanigans ensue, including a lot of flashing and a fight in a dumpster. Meanwhile, Chris is drinking FULL FAT eggnog. What is he thinking?

We also talk about some delightful video games that feature soccer elements like Rocket League, Crazy Taxi 2, and Excitebike. Plus, the weird ways to spell Haleigh and the introduction of Jerry’s family! And Duke Silver makes another appearance! What lucky ducks we are.

EPISODE
S5, E9: Ron and Diane

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Jeppson’s Malort

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Cabin Fever Activities

CATEGORIES
Christmas Songs

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Ep. 81: Let’s Build a Park, Shall We?

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “Let's Build a Park, Shall We?” on Spreaker.

Leslie Knope is MAD this episode because she has to deal with those rude folks over in Eagleton, who want to build a park for Pawnee. And a big chunk of the Pawnee crew is helping Tom get Rent-a-Swag off the ground. Meanwhile, Andy and April have some of their greatest shenanigans and wrap it all up by helping a lost kid (named Joey!) find his mother. But we do say goodbye to Burt Macklin, one of the best damn agents the FBI has ever seen.

We recently celebrated Haleigh’s birthday, so we’re all kind of tired. Also, you know…the news is pretty sad lately. But we’re not talking about that, mainly because we recorded before things went to hell this week. Instead, we’re chatting the deliciousness of McDonald’s cookies, how parks get created, and seeing Jen Barkley in car commercials.

Sean also has a very special announcement in this episode, and it’s 100% worth tuning in for that. Thanks for listening.

EPISODE
S5, E8: Pawnee Commons

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Bud Light Seltzer

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Pizza Toppings

CATEGORIES
Simpsons Characters

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Ep. 80: Aren’t You Supposed to be a Sheep?

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “Aren't You Supposed to be a Sheep?” on Spreaker.

April wants to build a dog park, but the best location for it is Lot 48, home of Leslie’s triumphant big accomplishment formerly-a-pit-but-eventually-turning-into-a-human-park. Of course, that won’t fly with Leslie, so IT. IS. ON. Plus Oren delivers a great line about what it’s like to be a sheep.

Meanwhile, Tom is looking for more Rent a Swag investors, Ben keeps getting job offers, and Andy is trying to solve a criminal case right inside the very walls of town hall.

Plus, we’re talking about mediating disputes at work, Sean has regular encounters with a customer that has poor hygiene, and we dive into the NBA All-Star Game festivities, including the dunk contest, despite the fact all of this happened two weeks ago. Better late than never, amirite? On top of that, we theorize about hypothetical dunks we’d like to see. It’s absolutely magical.

EPISODE
S5, E7: Leslie vs. April

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Lady Bird Lemonade from Uncle Billy’s

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Activities Our Dog Does

CATEGORIES
Dog Breeds

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Ep. 79: Meet the Parents

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “Meet the Parents” on Spreaker.

Ben and Leslie are engaged – time to throw a party! There’s only one problem: Ben’s parents can’t stand each other, and Ben is worried they’ll derail the whole shindig. Meanwhile, Tom and Jean Ralphio have a new business idea, but it seems only Tom is taking it seriously. Will that be enough for Ron to invest? We’ll have to find out! Also, Chris is sad. But what else is new?

Sean’s planning a work trip FOR parks and rec activities. What a fun time! This week was Fat Tuesday and we certainly celebrated in style (via eating 65 pounds of food). He’s also furious over the new pizza from Pizza Hut that features cheese sticks as part of the crust. Things are just getting wild over here.

EPISODE
S5, E6: Ben’s Parents

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Cider Noir from Texas Keeper Cidery

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Excuses to Miss Work

CATEGORIES
Breakfast Items

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Ep. 78: An Episode Full of Surprises

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “An Episode Full of Surprises” on Spreaker.

It’s Halloween! Ron and Andy are in charge of Diane’s kids, for some reason. Leslie is flustered because she and Ben are planning to start their life together, but all of a sudden, Ben might not be coming back to Pawnee. What a surprise! But spoiler alert: it’s not the biggest surprise of the episode.

Meanwhile, some of the gang is watching thriller-we-wish-was-real Death Canoe 4. In more serious news, Jerry also suffers a fart attack, necessitating the need for a garage sale. What kind of fun treasure will the Pawnee crew dig up? Plus, it’s the birth of Rent-a-Swag! Tom finally has a great business idea, and we’re so proud of him.

We also dive into all the random pizza holidays that have been created over the past few years. And Joey shares a fun book worth checking out, Mark Bittman’s How to Cook Everything. What a tasty tome!

EPISODE
S5, E5: Halloween Surprise

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Brethen of the Road Riesling from Winc

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Things to Look for in a New Home

CATEGORIES
Horror Movies

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Ep. 77: Let’s Talk About Sex, Baby!

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “Let's Talk About Sex, Baby!” on Spreaker.

We’re talkin’ ‘bout sex, baby! Leslie has to teach senior citizens about sex education, but Marcia Langman (and her husband Marshall) are here to make things difficult. Meanwhile, Tommy Edamame is obsessed with screens, so Ron takes him out to get some fresh air and real-world experience. It’s disastrous, as you might expect.

Meanwhile, we share some of our more memorable sex education moments. Sean thinks April and Ben are about to become an item – will he prove to be a mind reader of the future? In the meantime, he’s mad about MANY things, including some that are actually topical to parks and rec. This could totally be a deleted scene from Parks and Rec! Except none of us were on the show so it would be a confusing B-plot. Either way, Mike Schur would probably dig it. Let’s get a reboot going!

We also sprinkle in Pokemon puns and noises throughout the episode. Which reminds us, Sean and Joey once re-enacted every Pokemon move in real life. Here it is!

EPISODE
S5, E4: Sex Education

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Tito’s Vodka with Pure Leaf Sweet Tea and Lemon Juice

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Top 5 Ways to Detox from Your Phone

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Ep. 76: Pawnee Porpoises and Therapy Sessions

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “Pawnee Porpoises and Therapy Sessions” on Spreaker.

Leslie is trying to keep a pool open for the Pawnee Porpoises youth swim team, but she has to jump through quite a few hoops to make it happen. Classic Jeremy Jamm ruining our plans. Ben and April are stuck in a parking garage for the entire episode. Ron goes on a date with a woman that’s not named Tammy. WHAT?! Chris Traeger has a therapist now, so that means the parks department has to install a 3-1-1 line? Look, this part of the plot doesn’t really make sense, but here we are.

Sean is MAD this episode. Why? Because it illustrates everything that’s wrong with BIG POLITICS. But he sure is impressed by Leslie’s perm. Plus we reminisce about our first encounters with smoking cigars. Much like Tom, we did not like them.

EPISODE
S5, E3: How a Bill Becomes a Law

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Shiner S’more Chocolate and Marshmallow Ale

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Top 5 Favorite Sporting Events

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Ep. 75: Soda Taxes and Training Interns

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “Soda Taxes and Training Interns” on Spreaker.

Leslie wants to introduce a soda tax on the ABSURDLY large cups that Sweetums is selling to people. Across the country in Washington, D.C. Ben Wyatt tries to earn the respect of his interns. But first, he has to win over someone near and dear to his heart. While all of that’s going on, Tom and Chris try to get Andy into tip-top shape to join the police force. Andy runs a lot and it gets us winded.

Meanwhile, Sean is in incredible pain from all of the sports he’s been playing recently, we briefly talk about our favorite Oscars films (despite only seeing between 11 and 22 percent of the nominations), and we dissect the wonderful meme of Rob Lowe wearing a hat with the NFL logo on it. Joey also goes on a passionate rant against Apple despite having way too many Apple products, but the rant is only for like 30 seconds. Sorry, Siri.

After we recorded this episode, Kobe Bryant, his daughter Gianna and seven others were killed in a helicopter crash outside Los Angeles. We hopped on the phone to record an additional outro, sharing some of our favorite Kobe Bryant moments and what he accomplished with basketball, business, and storytelling. If you haven’t seen his Oscar-winning “Dear Basketball” short, we’d highly recommend it.

EPISODE
S5, E2: Soda Tax

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Milkshakes from Shake Shack

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Top 5 Track and Field Events

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Ep. 74: We’re Taking a Trip to Washington!

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “We're Taking a Trip to Washington!” on Spreaker.

Welcome to Season 5! *The crowd goes wild* Leslie, Ben, April, and Andy are all in Washington, D.C. doing very big important government things. Meanwhile, Ron is hosting a BBQ and literally only has the meat, which is still alive. Which one could argue is the most important part, but still. At least give us a plate or something, man. Sean is thrilled that Tom and Ann are no longer an item.

We’re sampling Cookies and Cream Twix because apparently we’re part-timing in ASMR nowadays. We’re putting a twist on trivia, AND we’re adding a new bit: Categories! Exciting stuff all around. Joey also shares a tip for those Instagram Boomerang users out there. And after Chris reprimands Ron, we do a little roleplaying of Sean being stern towards Haleigh. How does that turn out? Finally, Sean shares a crappy situation from work.

EPISODE
S5, E1: Ms. Knope Goes to Washington

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Austin Eastciders Spiced Cider

TOP 5 OF THE EPISODE
Top 5 Side Items for a BBQ

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Ep. 73: A Season for the Ages

Parks n Wrecked Logo - A podcast about Parks and Rec

Listen to “A Season for the Ages” on Spreaker.

Season 4 is in the books! Sean gives a recap of the season, including some of his favorite moments, as well as his least favorite moments (spoiler: it’s anytime Tom and Ann are dating). Then we turn the tables and run him over with an AMA, where we pepper him with all the questions. Find out things like what’s happened with Sean’s enemy that keeps coming into his job, his greatest accomplishments at work, when he let a bunch of children run rampant all over the place, and a heartwarming moment that will make you smile. And we could all use a little more of those warm and fuzzy feelings, you know?

Sean also makes his prediction for Season 5, plus next week’s episode, “Ms. Knope Goes to Washington.” Will he be spot on or is he just a big dreamer? We’ll find out next time!

DRINK OF THE EPISODE
Homemade martinis with Tito’s Handmade Vodka, Oso de Oro Dry Vermouth, and kalamata olives